The Lament for Spot Conlon
by its-never-lupus
Summary: [RaceSpot]Very cute, very fluffy SLASH! Please don't read if you're easily offended, it'd make me sad to get a flame! Anyways, please RR! Enjoy!


Disclaimer: Own nothing. Period. I made up all the locations in Brooklyn, including the lodging house, because I don't know if Brooklyn even HAD a lodging house. So, yeah. Don't own the Newsies! Wish I owned Spot! But I don't, so please, don't sue me! I'm broke! LOL! Now, on with the show! (In case y'all don't know, a lament is a sad song people would sing when someone that they loved died or went away. So Race is lamenting Spot leaving. This is now the end, I promise!) Happy reading! Warning, this is slash, if you're easily offended, please don't read. Thanx!

Another day is going by 

_I'm thinking about you all the time_

_But you're out there_

_And I'm here waiting_

**FLASHBACK**

"You're…leaving? But…why, Spot? Why?"

"Because Ise don't wanna spend my whole life in New York City, breaking my back for someone who don't care."

"Where…where will youse go?"

"I dunno. Somewhere out west, I guess."

"I love you, Spot."

"I know, kid. You take care of yourself, youse hear me?" 

That was two years ago. I passed into the 20th century without him. He was the light of my life. I mean, I know he's not coming back, but, hey, I can dream, right? O' course I can.

And I wrote this letter in my head 

_'Cuz so many thing were left unsaid_

_But now you're gone_

_And I can't think straight_

He kept me going. He was my encourager, my friend, my lover. Every now and then, I find myself wandering over to Brooklyn, just to see all of the places we went together. There's so many of them.

This could be the one last chance 

_To make you understand_

_I'd do anything_

_Just to hold you in my arms_

_To try to make you laugh_

_But somehow I can't put you in the past_

_I'd do anything_

_Just to fall asleep with you_

_Will you remember me?_

_'Cuz I know_

_I won't forget you_

Hmmm. There's the park where we met. I remember it well. He was selling papes, embellishing the headlines (as usual), and I saw him. He literally took my breath away. And there's the sub shop where I first told him how I felt about him. He looked stunned, and then asked me why. "Why, kid? Why'd youse choose me?" I hadn't hesitated before replying. "You're smart and you're funny and you don't take crap from nobody. Youse got more street smarts then Ise could ever hope to have, and I really respect youse. And, most importantly"-Here I had grinned wickedly-"Youse're damn sexy!" 

Together we broke all the rules 

_Dreaming of dropping out of school_

_And leave this place_

_To never come back_

But I know it's all in vain. He's not here, and he never will be again. It doesn't help, either, that I'm sitting 20 feet from the bench that both sealed my happiness and, later, destroyed it. Spot and I sat there when he said he loved me, and then, six months later, at midnight, when he said he was leaving. I tossed a rock idly into the harbor, and thought about the wonderful adventures we had, trooping all over the city, getting caught out after dark, and running away from the cops. How he swore he'd kill me (with a twinkle in his eye that said he'd never hurt me) if I ever told anyone his favorite song was 'O Danny Boy'. He'd change the words to 'O Tony boi, O Tony boi, I love you so!' to sing for me.

So now, maybe after all these years 

_If you miss me have no fear_

_I'll be here_

_I'll be waiting_

It's like there's a hole in my heart that's getting a little bigger every day. And I know that wandering around all his old haunts isn't going to help me heal any faster, but the memories are comforting. Especially the Brooklyn Lodging House. Two months after we met we spent our first night together there. I'll never forget it. He kissed me and asked "Kid, will youse still respect yourself (and me) in the morning?" "Of course!" I said emphatically. "I love you." "Racetrack Higgins, you imp, you!" he said, with a twinkle in his eye. Then he kissed me and led me to his room. I was tingling all over when over when we went in, but that was nothing compared to after he'd had his way with me. It felt like electricity was coursing through my body. OW!

This could be the one last chance to make you understand 

_And I just can't let you leave me once again_

_I'd do anything_

_Just to hold you in my arms_

_To try to make you laugh_

_But somehow I can't put you in the past_

_I'd do anything_

_Just to fall asleep with you_

_Will you remember me?_

_'Cuz I know_

_I won't forget you_

"Oh, Spottie-boi, oh, Spottie-boi, why aren't you HERE?!" I shouted as I threw a stone the size of my hand into the harbor. He always loved my hands. "What makes youse think I'm not?" came the voice that had haunted my dreams for the past two years. I spun around like a top, not daring to believe it. There he was, standing on the dock, looking at me with one eyebrow raised. I practically flew into his arms, crying with happiness. "But…I thought you left. For good!" "Never for good" he said, stroking my hair. "I missed youse, kid. I couldn't stop thinking about you. I cried myself to sleep for the first three months." I looked at him, surprised. Spot Conlon, crying? He must've missed me more than he thought. "But then I told myself 'Look, stupid, he's not here, so just forget about him'. But I couldn't, kid. I just couldn't. I looked for another lover, but I kept looking for qualities that only you had." He looked at me, smiling. "The way your eyes light up when you smile, the way your fingers sometimes twitch when you ain't playin' cards, and especially"- he looked at me with an evil grin-"The way you look when you're asleep after you've been on top." I blushed. Like I said, pull-no-punches when it comes to telling people how he feels. Usually. But he's right: I do sleep like a baby after sex. "So…if you're back…?" "Why'd I leave in the first place?" he finished for me. "I wanted to get away from Pulitzer, o' course, but, also, I didn't know what I wanted from me, from you, from anything anymore. Sos I went out west to clear my head. But I missed youse too much, so I decided to come back."

I'd do anything 

_Just to hold you in my arms_

_To try to make you laugh_

_But somehow I can't put you in the past_

_I'd do anything_

_Just to fall asleep with you_

_Will you remember me?_

_'Cuz I know_

_I won't forget you_

"So…are youse back to stay?" _With me?_ I added silently. "Yeah. What, youse think I'd leave youse again as fair game for any other horny guy?" He pulled me toward him, one arm around my waist, his other hand playing with a lock of my hair. "I should hope not!" I said, only half teasing. The truth was, I hoped he never left, ever again. "Don't worry, kid. I'm not going anywhere. At least, not without youse right beside me." I looked into those big brown eyes, and knew they were telling me the truth. He wasn't going to leave me. Not ever again, if I could help it. Then he kissed me. Oh, yeah. Electricity seemed to crackle in the air, and we broke apart, panting. "Race, remember the night I left, you said you loved me?" I nodded. "I always regretted not saying this: I love you too, Race. Always have, probably always will." I died and went to heaven. He still loved me, even after two years of being apart. I didn't say anything, just grabbed him and kissed him. You can probably guess what happened next. Mmmm. Electricity again. As I lay there, watching him sleep, I thought, 'No more laments. No more tears. He's here with me. And that's where he belongs.' I kissed him softly on the cheek, turned out the light, and lay down to sleep.

END

A/N: Whadja think? Whadja think? I wrote the majority of this in my classes, but I think it turned out OK. Very fluffy, very cute. Now, what you do after you've read this is push the little button that says 'Review'. Go on, you KNOW you want to. Please review, you're helping me become a better writer! Thanx! 


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